I dreamt my father and I were into heroin and finally had something in common. I didn’t want to share a needle with him without cleaning it. The only bleach I could find was something called “Perimeter Check” and it fizzed when I poured it into a cup. It got kicked over and Amber cleaned it up. The non junkie version of my dad came to the apartment door to drop off a suitcase. I did not get up or see him and the junkie version and I joked about how he was “a good Christian, well…he’s a Christian.” Amber left the bag by the couch. Junkie dad said ”Well I’m gonna jump off.” and loaded the needle. I decided to smoke it instead and held the lighter under tin foil. Earlier in the dream I had a white van. I took it to be inspected by a garage on a dock and a sea monster ate the mechanic, folding the passenger door the wrong way in the process. I pushed the door back into place but there was still a little blood on it. I hoped nobody had seen and drove away. It wasn’t even my fault, I don’t know why I tried to hide it. I bought a new door online and the police came to make sure it wasn’t a coverup. I told them I just wanted to avoid an increase in insurance and they bought it even though the blood remained. After they left I climbed a giant but narrow book case that rose from my parents yard like a radio tower. There was an old TV set with channel knobs at the top but it did not work. The cord dangled from the back plugged into nothing. I clung to the frame high up. A childhood friend walked through the yard and I remembered the body buried under the foundation of my parents barn. Fear that body would inevitably be discovered lit me up with heat. I had killed before. I was guilty. When I woke up I knew there was no body, just as I knew it had been true in a dream before.
This dream could indicate that the dreamer might be subconsciously struggling to find common ground with their father or to connect with him in some way. The drug use in the dream could symbolize a desire for temporary escape or a coping mechanism for something in the waking life. The fear of sharing needles and seeking out cleaning supplies might indicate a sense of caution or responsibility, despite the temptation to use drugs. The appearance of a sea monster and the blood on the van door might symbolize a feeling of guilt or fear of being caught, perhaps related to something the dreamer feels they are responsible for in waking life. Climbing the bookcase and remembering a buried body could represent the dreamer feeling trapped or weighed down by a past mistake or secret. Overall, the dream may suggest a need to address these underlying feelings and perhaps seek reconciliation or open communication with their father.